


What Truly Matters

by Blue_Night



Series: What Happens [4]
Category: Men's Football RPF, Real Person Fiction
Genre: Anal Sex, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Explicit Sexual Content, Feelings Realization, Former Lovers - Freeform, M/M, Making Up, Mistakes, Reconciliation Sex, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-05
Updated: 2018-11-05
Packaged: 2019-08-19 09:17:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16531730
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Blue_Night/pseuds/Blue_Night
Summary: Sequel to'What Remains Unspoken'.Robert comes back to Thomas after visiting Marco in Dortmund, and Thomas confronts him with his jealousy.





	What Truly Matters

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Bluerose06](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bluerose06/gifts), [Janie94](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Janie94/gifts).



> My dear Bluerose06,
> 
> I think that this part of the series will give you some answers, and I decided to write it sooner than I'd intended to write it because of your comment on _'What Lasts Forever'_. I guess that you've come to know me well enough to suspect that there might perhaps be a fifth part Thomas' talk with Robert is hinting at. ;-)
> 
> My dearest Janie94,
> 
> for some reasons I decided to give you the next part of this series without waiting for your begging, I hope it will console your broken Müllendowski heart at least a little bit!! ;-*

Thomas wakes up to a pair of arms wrapping themselves tightly around him. He's still trying to blink the sleep away when Robert pushes his nose in the warm crook where his neck meets his shoulder, pressing himself against Thomas' body as if he wanted to crawl into him.

Thomas didn't expect Robert to come to him after his long drive back from Dortmund. He even thought that the dark-haired striker would be grateful to be alone in his house to dwell in the memories of his day with his first love, and he gasps out in shocked surprise at the tight embrace that almost suffocates him.

“What are you doing here?” is his first question when he has finally found his tongue again, and his voice sounds as much accusing as it actually sounds relieved that Robert has yet found his way to him.

“You didn't pick up your phone when I called you,” Robert murmurs, his voice slurred with exhaustion. He must have stripped down to his underwear before he crawled into Thomas' bed, and his feet are cold against Thomas' calves. Somehow Robert has managed to drape himself around him like a giant octopus, and it's clear that he won't let go of Thomas any time soon again.

“You didn't pick up your damn phone,” Robert now repeats, “you didn't answer to my messages, you...” his voice trails off, and he pushes his face deeper into its hiding place on Thomas' throat. Robert feels so perfect in his arms, and he smells so good, but there is another scent on him, intermingling with his natural fragrance, and Thomas freezes in place when the scent he recognizes without any problems is suddenly everywhere inside his nose and his mouth.

“Get away from me,” he growls, trying to push Robert away, but the other one clings to him for dear life, wrapping his arms tighter around Thomas' back with a small protesting sound.

“Damn it, get away from me! How can you even dare coming in my bed when you're still smelling of him?” Thomas wants to beat Robert, he wants to shout and cry, and he's struggling in earnest now, his only goal to bring some distance between Robert and him before his heart will break completely. “Has Marco run out of fresh towels that he didn't allow you to take a shower or what? Fuck, get out of here!” he screams, and Robert eventually loosens his embrace and stares at him, his eyes shining dark blue in his snow-white face.

Thomas stares back at him with balled fists, breathing hard, neither of them moving. Robert isn't touching him any longer, but he's still close enough that Thomas can smell him – and Marco.

“You think that I cheated on you,” Robert states after a moment or two of dead silence between them, and he sounds more shocked than hurt. “You really think that I had sex with Marco.”

“You smell of him – hell, you're literally reeking of his aftershave, Lewandowski! What did ya think? That I'm too old and dense to notice that? How many hours have you rolled around between the sheets that you're stinking of him like that? No wonder that you were so eager to visit him. What does he have that I don't?”

Several emotions are flickering over Robert's face, and he looks so hurt and confused that a lump forms in Thomas' throat. “I didn't sleep with Marco, Thomas. I would never ever cheat on you. Marco needed comfort, and I held him in my arms while we were watching some videos, but nothing else happened between us. We didn't kiss or fuck, I just held him like you would do it for Manu without thinking if he needed some comfort.”

Robert sounds so honest and sincere, and he's returning Thomas' mistrustful glance without blinking. He looks angry now himself, angry and upset, but there is not even the faintest hint of a bad conscience visible on his exhausted features. “You drove all the way to Dortmund to watch some stupid videos with Marco?” Thomas snorts incredulously, but he feels unsure and as confused as Robert still looks like.

“Old videos about some matches, BVB matches.” Robert says, and Thomas wants to laugh at that, but Robert's face is hard and the laughter dies in Thomas' throat. “You were watching old BVB matches?” he asks, disbelief written all over his face, and this actually sounds too ridiculous to be a lame and false excuse. Robert's eyes warn him not to make a mocking remark about his past time with Marco, and his voice is hoarse and strangled when he adds:

“Matches when Erik played.”

This dry statement silences Thomas effectively, and now he really doesn't feel like laughing any longer. He swallows and gapes at Robert when he finally, finally realizes how wrong he has been. He doesn't even need to ask Robert why he held Marco as close as he must have done it for hours to smell of him like that, he can see the answer in his eyes. Thomas is sure that he'll find the traces of Marco's tears on Robert's sweater if he actually went so far to check it.

Which he won't do. He and Marco are not close friends – mostly because of Thomas' jealousy of his rival about Robert's love – but Thomas knows how it feels to be lovesick too well to merely think of laughing at Marco's grief and heartache. Robert actually never gave him a reason to think that he's cheating on him with Marco as he realizes now, it was always only his own jealousy and uncertainty making him fear that Robert could still want Marco more than he wants him.

There are certainly only very few people Marco can open up to when it comes to his secret relationship with Erik and his heartache because Erik had to leave him – like so many other people left him – and Robert is definitely one of them, probably the only one who really understands him and how he's feeling and suffering. The mere thought of Robert leaving Munich to play for another club is choking him, and Erik actually didn't want to leave, so how must Marco be feeling with an ocean separating him from the love of his life? Thomas can hardly imagine what the blond Dortmunder must go through at the moment, what he has gone through for several months by now, and his own problems suddenly don't look so serious and bad any longer.

Yes, he doesn't play as good and as often as he would like to play, but he's healthy and safe in Robert's love, and he also doesn't need to prove himself in the same way Marco has to prove himself as Dortmund's new captain, and this without his tower of strength by his side that Erik always was for him.

Thomas would indeed do the same for Manuel without thinking, watch old videos of their games for hours together with him and hold him while he cries his heart out on his shoulder if his best friend was suffering from a broken heart and Thomas was the only one he could talk to. This was what Manuel was trying to tell him earlier that day, and he feels ashamed that he blamed the man he loves so much for something Robert would indeed never do. The dark-haired striker is a man of his word, and he would never cheat on him, even though the promise he gave Thomas back then three years ago when they came together was a silent one without spoken words.

He sits there on the bed, and his hands drop down and uncurl when he hangs his head down low and whispers: “I'm sorry, Lewy.”

Robert moves closer, a little bit cautious, and this time it's Thomas who buries his face on the other one's shoulder when Robert wraps his arms around him again. “Yes, I know. I'm sorry too.”

They hold each other close for some time, half sitting and half kneeling on the bed, and Thomas draws in a shaky breath, wishing he could just ignore Marco's aftershave on his boyfriend. “Are you mad at me, Tommy?” Robert murmurs, pressing him close. “Please don't do that again, don't ignore me like that.”

“I was afraid that there wouldn't be any messages from you. I thought that you were too busied to send me a message or call me,” Thomas admits, and Robert sighs and nuzzles his cheek. “I'll never be too busied to call my boyfriend, tiger. I love you.”

“You never tell me. Only when you think that I'm sleeping.”

“I do. I tell you that I love you every day, only not with words. Why do you think that I didn't push my transfer last summer – and the summer before last season?” Robert draws back to look at him, and Thomas bites down on his bottom lip. “You stayed because of me?” he asks, and he knows that he shouldn't feel as amazed and happy about Robert's sacrifice as he actually does.

Robert regards him, and the love Thomas can see in his eyes forms another lump in his throat. “I walked away from Marco back then, but I could never walk away from you, Thomas,” he says quietly, and this is for sure the biggest love declaration Thomas has ever gotten. He leans in to kiss Robert, a soft and chaste kiss, but full of love and tenderness.

“Why didn't you tell me that you were awake, Tommy?” Robert sighs when they part again, and Thomas shrugs his shoulders. “Because I was jealous and angry. Because I was stupid. Because you only tell me that you love me when you think that I can't hear you.”

There are many more reasons, but these are the most important ones. Robert resists the urge to roll his eyes at his stupidity, and he sighs again and looks thoughtfully at him instead. “I guess that I just think that I don't have the right to tell you that I love you after all that happened during the last two seasons. I try to show you how much you mean to me, but it's hard to say these words. You don't tell me that you love me that often either, Tommy.”

This is the truth, actually, but Thomas hadn't really noticed that he'd stopped telling Robert that he loves him some time ago. He closes his eyes and leans their foreheads together in a wordless apology.

“I was a jealous idiot,” he eventually offers, and Robert chuckles against his cheek. “Jealous, yes. But never an idiot.” He cups Thomas' face with both hands and looks him in the eyes. “You don't need to be jealous, Tommy. I would never cheat on you.”

“Do you still love him, Robert?”

“Marco is no threat to you, Thomas.”

“That's not the answer to my question.”

Robert strokes two single tears from his face, and his expression is sincere and tender. Thomas hadn't noticed that he'd started to cry silent tears, and his throat tightens when he sees Robert's deep love for him in his eyes so clearly again – for the first time in what feels like ages.

“But this is all that truly matters, Tommy.”

Yes, it is. Thomas finally acknowledges the truth. He'd always known about the special bond between Robert and Marco, right from the beginning when Robert joined the FCB and he fell in love with the handsome striker with the dark hair and the blue eyes. Marco was Robert's first love, and Thomas knows that Robert will never stop loving him, but Marco is not a threat to him, has never been, only in Thomas' imagination.

Even if Robert had actually slept with Marco, then it wouldn't change anything between Robert and him, because their love is about so much more than sex, and Robert's love and desire for Marco don't diminish the love and desire he feels for Thomas. Maybe he even loves and desires him so much because of what he had with Marco, as strange as this might be.

Thomas takes Robert's face in both hands as well, and his smile is genuine and his heart is finally freed from any jealousy that had still been left in him a few minutes ago when he says:

“You're right, Lewy. This is all that truly matters, this and that I love you.”

 

***

 

Passion explodes between them when Thomas seals their promise with a kiss, and they start to rip their clothes from their bodies with urgent desire, burning with the need to feel each other close. Their desperate kisses are messy and deep and wet, and their hands roam over heated flesh and card through already tousled hair as they pull and shove at each other until they fall down onto the mattress with Robert on top of Thomas.

“Love you, tiger, need you so much,” Robert whispers against his swollen lips before he claims them in another fierce and deep kiss, and Thomas scratches over his back with his nails as he tries to pull him closer and deepen their kiss even more. They wrestle with each other for some time, rolling around on the crumbled sheets, and Thomas fumbles blindly for the drawer, pushing Robert down when he has found what he was searching for.

Robert stares up at him with dark eyes and burning cheeks, and the predatory look on his face makes Thomas shiver. He hurries to line Robert up, and the cerulean blue eyes widen in surprise. Robert apparently didn't expect Thomas to bottom for him, and Thomas proves him right that he's not in submission mode tonight when he straddles him and sinks down on Robert's rock-hard cock instead of lying down on his back.

Tonight he will take from Robert what he wants, and he glances down at his boyfriend with a predatory smile of his own when he braces his hands against Robert's hard and well-shaped breast muscles. Robert inhales sharply when he breaches Thomas' tight ring muscle, and Thomas stops for a moment to adjust to Robert's impressive size, but he welcomes the burn in his tight and unprepared channel, because it makes him feel alive and grounds him in a way he has missed feeling for far too long.

Robert grasps his hips, but he doesn't try to make him move, obviously willing to surrender to the tiger and let him have his way with him. Thomas starts to move after another minute, lifting himself up just to push his full weight down again, using his arms on Robert's chest for support. The dark-haired striker groans, and Thomas can feel him twitching inside him.

“You will wait until I have finished, Lewandowski!” he orders, and Robert grins about their changed roles.

“Not sure I can do that,” he teases him, “you look so beautiful like this, fucking yourself on my dick like that, tiger.”

Thomas growls and bends down to shut him up with a kiss, and Robert snickers into his mouth, but the sound ends in a long and loud moan when Thomas moves faster up and down on his throbbing shaft. “Don't you dare coming before me!” Thomas reminds him smugly, earning another even louder moan in return. “I'm doing my best, tiger, but you feel so amazing around me!” Robert gasps out, and Thomas kisses him again, telling him without words how much he loves him. Robert's fingers dig into his hipbones, and the slight pain spurs Thomas on to take what he needs and drive both of them crazy until nothing else exists any longer, only their deep love and desire for each other, the only things that truly matter.

Robert bucks his hips up to meet his hard thrusts, and Thomas draws back from his mouth to straighten his back again. He cranes his head back and closes his eyes, concentrating on the feeling of Robert's throbbing cock buried so deep inside him arouses in him. He changes the angle a bit and loosens his right hand from Robert's chest to wrap it around his own leaking hardness, knowing that Robert will need all of his self-control to hold back until Thomas finishes when he's allowed to watch his boyfriend jerk off – a sight he doesn't get as often as he would like it to get.

It's actually a good thing that he has already found his release earlier that day, because Thomas wouldn't last long enough to enjoy this if he hadn't, and he is careful not to use too much pressure and draw this out as best as he can in his painful arousal. He feels so full and stretched, and he loves it, riding Robert's hard cock with wanton abandon until his world shrinks to the small spot where their bodies are connected. Robert can't stifle his groans and grunts, and he whispers breathless words of encouragement and adoration, his voice that hoarse that it is hardly recognizable any longer.

“Fuck, you feel so good around me, tiger. Just like that, you're gorgeous, want you so much, you have no idea!”

Thomas' entire body is throbbing and pulsing with need, his walls clenching around the tender intruder and sending hot waves of lust through his veins. “You're mine, Lewy, only mine!” he growls, and Robert pulls him down for a moment to kiss him before he releases him from his tight grip and lets him sit up again. “Yes, yours, Tommy. I'll always be yours,” he murmurs, and Thomas knows that he has once said these words to Marco as well.

Robert belongs to both of them, and he always will, but the thought doesn't hurt Thomas anymore. As long as Robert will come back to him after visiting Marco, he'll be fine, and that's the only thing that actually matters.

“Love you, Robert,” he breathes when he feels himself getting close, his eyes falling shut with the sensations coursing through him. He can feel Robert's eyes on his face and he lets go, shuddering through his forceful climax above him as he coats Robert's six pack with his ecstasy in several hot spurts. His secret core spasms around Robert's dick with every new wave of pure and almost painfully intense pleasure, and he doesn't stop his motions, riding out his orgasm until the hot waves subside to the warm aftermath. Robert's strangled cry echoes in the air of Thomas' gloomy bedroom when he follows him over the edge, painting Thomas' walls with his own release. Thomas sinks down and clenches his muscles around him to milk the very last drop from him, and the moonlight shining through the window and onto Robert's flushed face bathes him in its silvery light, making Robert look like an ancient Greek or Roman god in his moment of ecstasy.

Thomas slumps down on him without caring about the sticky mess between their bodies when it's finally over, and they lie like this for a while, listening to each other's heartbeats.

“I love you, Thomas,” Robert says into the darkness, and Thomas smiles against his neck. “I can hear you, I'm still awake.”

“I hope so, this is getting uncomfortable. You're heavy, Müller.”

“You're not really a romantic, are you, Lewandowski?” Thomas complains, but he gets up to fetch a damp cloth and wipe the mess away they've made. Robert wraps his arms around him and buries his nose on Thomas' shoulder again with a contented sigh when he lies down beside him once more, and much to Thomas' surprise it doesn't bother him any longer that he can still smell Marco's aftershave on him. It intermingles with Robert's wonderful scent and his own natural fragrance to a new and unique mixture, and Thomas thinks that it has to be like this when he closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep with Robert wrapped safely in his arms.

Love is not an one-way thing, its paths and ways entwined and hardly ever straight forward, it's a mystery and comes when you least expect it, and it has many different ways to express itself. You can fall in love with someone and yet still love the one you had before them, and you can love more than one person at once, all of them with the same depths – just like some people will love only one person in their entire life sometimes.

But Thomas doesn't care about others and what they might say, not any longer. Robert loves him and he loves Robert just as much, and this is all that truly matters to him.


End file.
